Relationship vs. Friendship

The other day as I was contemplating the universe and all things deep, I had a profound thought. OK stop your little skeptical grin and hear me out. My thought was this--it seems that as a church and as leaders we are infatuated with developing and helping others to develop relationships, both inside and outside the church. We talk about the importance of relationships with other believers to help us grow in faith and accountability. We talk about the importance of developing relationships with unsaved people for the sake of leading them to Christ. There is so much talk of relationship these days, and it isn't just the church....political life, business life, pretty much everywhere you find people, relationship is talked about and pursued.

All this is great, but I feel the need to challenge our motive here. It seems that emphasizing the relationship puts too much focus on us as the recipient of the interaction. We have Christian friends because they help US grow in our faith. We have accountability relationships because they provide a safety net for us. You may think that I am arguing minutia here but keep reading. Not only does it seem so focused on us, but "relationship" is so impersonal. What exactly does it mean? If you say, "I have a relationship with Bill," that can mean a variety of things, or it can mean nothing. People can have relationships, churches can have relationships, businesses can have relationships, even dogs can have relationships!

Now for the hook......I believe that a better way is to focus on building friendships. Did you know that in the Scriptures the word "relationship" only occurs 4 times? In contrast the word "Friendship" occurs over 170 times. Now I don't suggest we build our theology solely off of etymology or the frequency of word usage, but it helps to make the case.

I think we would have a greater degree of success in our lives (real success, not just bigger paychecks and nicer cars) if we made it our goal to build and facilitate real friendship. Relationship often has many strings attached (you scratch my back and I'll scratch yours), but friendship is unconditional. As Smitty put it, "Friends are friends forever...." (you're welcome for getting that oldie in your head for the rest of the day)!

Sorry for such a long blog, but consider the benefit of the challenge!

peaceonearthgoodwilltoallmen